yesterday was all a dream..

how am i suppose to feel right now.

2010-03-23T07:17:00.000-07:00

Imagine seeing each other for 4 years, 5 days a week and now,
we don't get to see each other at all..
awkward and sad feeling, with no doubt i miss you all..
i miss the laughter, the fights, mostly the lame jokes,
yes,
it's irritating

but that's what makes you so real.

not perfect but real.
we had our differences maybe that's why we click so well.
now, everyone around you currently is fighting for the same dream as you.
it's too frightening to trust once again.

trust to me last time was like training wheels now it's like without the training part,
i'm left alone. i'm scared.

my best friend left me, i'm scared to be left alone again. it's really scary..
i don't know, feeling afraid wasn't what i had in mind.
i've been putting on a strong front for 4 freaking years and finally i just broke down.
what is a hopeless girl suppose to do.

it was all i had.

2010-03-17T09:08:00.000-07:00

i'm closing down my blog soon..
i haven't been blogging.. i think i'll remake my blog.. i'm disowning this blog :(

i'm scared
i'm not sure if i wanna blog.
i'm afraid to offend people, really.
i'm sorry but i'm just gonna say it.

i miss you alot, we've been the best of friends for 3 years. why did you just leave like that. i feel like a lost dog. i'm really heart broken. i just think that you should come to your senses. i love you as my best friend but what am i to you. just a doll that can entertain you for a minute and be placed aside just like that, when you found something else. i don't know.
others say that they already predicted that you would leave me, official they were proven right recently.. you care less now, you don't care about your family and friends anymore. i regret too many things, i wish i hadn't encourage you. you've found your true love but you lost oh so much... like your, family and your friends.
do you remember saying that you can live without him and that you still have your family and friends to live your life for. do you still remember the promise you've made. you promise not to do anything stupid because of him. i guess you've forgotten.
the only thing you can remember is him.
i guess your anniversary with him would be oh so much more worth and important then celebrating my birthday with me. you promised to celebrate my birthday this year, has that promise been forgotten too.
these words i've just written was something i have kept for oh so long in my heart.
i had to gather all my guts to write it down, after you read this, nothing will change, right. you'll just ignore this, right.
you'd just pretend like you've not seen this, right. well,let me tell you this carine, i was the one with you when you cried and needed someone there and easily you've forgotten me.
well all i gotta say is... well, i don't know what else to say. it's just that i'm sorry, sorry for reasons you think i shouldn't be sorry for (in the past)...
if sorry would make my best friend come back. i would bow in front of you, to do so, in front of million of people. i would just throw my pride away to have my old best friend back.
i don't know what's worth anymore.

here i go again..

2010-02-07T05:10:00.000-08:00

it's been a long time since i blog
i think i want to start again.. blogging let me express..
hahas, now new life in new school. new friends, new environment.
this time it's not fun and games anymore..
i'm studying for my future.
slacking for my future too... hehe.
i'm glad i've made friends, they are one crazy bunch of friends
who i love and adore so much... they are worth keeping, seriously.
i feel like i wanna run away from this school that i'm in.
too many distractions, can't concentrate...
2 years is 10% of my life that's what my lecturer says..
he is very naggy but still his nagginess reminds me so much of mr tang.
i wonder how's doing? hopefully fine!!!!!!!!!!!! i miss the school and him
so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm going crazy....
schools tiring me out, no. actually i'm tiring myself out cause i do stuff
really really last minute. oh boy, i got scolding for that too... it was a
wake up call.. seriously what teachers in sec school say about leaving the sheltering walls were right. you have to walk alone. it's really cold
sometimes but you have to bare with it. no matter what..
i'm enjoying every moment i have with the people around me now cause i'm
scared to regret later on... i badly want to go out with my sec school friends
again but sometimes somethings just reminded me why i stayed away from them
previously... i hope to see them again someday!!!!!!!!

let hem play!

2009-12-12T04:51:00.000-08:00

this litlle boy is the bomb di-ga-dee bomb. he is only 2 but oh so cute, love him..
rock on! i saw him on youtube. man, he is cute! so young and yet he can rock the guitar well! i'm really digging his mumbling now. lols.

korea-crazy twins!!!

2009-11-28T06:27:00.000-08:00

i love it when you chase after me for letters
and go crazy over stuff that we love.
i love that i don't have to please you in anyway.
i feel i can be myself around you. i wish we
could be closer earlier. i will miss you and
your madness over the littlest thing that we love.
i am really happy to have known both of
you. Despite all the previous fights happening in
class i still will miss you both.
i know you guys won't change, at least i hope you
don't but just lessen on the hating and the madness
please, we all need to learn how to love, man.
i wish you two the best and forever more.

to: val & vee <3

ps: go on loving kpop and gossip girl...

to all my loves

2009-11-28T05:40:00.000-08:00

is holidays supposed to be this boring...
it's really my last holiday in my secondary school life and yet it feels like i am going to cry really. tears of boredom! next year, i have to go back to square one, ('hello, i'm nur and you are?') i'm honestly really scared. i really don't know what my future holds.. i'm scared to be judged without even saying a word. i just want to crawl in my bed each day, doing nothing. seriously, this world i am in, right now is a total mess!!!!!!!!!! i wanna work hard but again the word 'scared' has it all written on my freaking face. people like me would love to ignore tons of stuff and be sheltered at home where i know hurt can never come near me. outside those brown wooden closed door lives a scary world where i know i can't avoid any longer..
it doesn't mean that once i opened that door, i'm walking alone.

to all my loves, my friends.
for all the years we've been together was the best years of my life, that i can promise you.

thanks for showing the care and concern that i needed, i will never forget you. i won't look at you and look away, i promise. i will smile and say 'hi'. i know i have said a lot of hurtful things to you. sorry. let's just say i wasn't using my brain.
i'm sorry for putting tears to your eyes with those thoughtless and harmful words.
i'd love to say sorry for all of the stupid things i've done to you.

i'm scared to loose you my friends, again the word 'scared' is used.

i hope i don't do the same mistake that i did in the past to all my other friends in the future.

-to the people, i hanged out with after cambridged and also carine and christine.
i love you all..

.heartbeat.

2009-11-28T05:12:00.001-08:00

d'moon!!!!!!!!!!

2009-11-12T09:01:00.001-08:00

must watch, for those who are a dbsk fan.

2009-10-23T07:28:00.000-07:00

i'm back" :(

2009-10-04T05:44:00.000-07:00

a day away from my n'level...
i fell ill... coughing like no ones business...
i cried while watching ps: i love you. seriously i had a great cry..
no one was home only me and the tv...
i felt as if i relate to the movie. Even though i'm not married or have a
dead husband it's just that i just touched me. i feel that life has to move on with or without your love ones around you.. honestly i lost 2 of my great-grandmother in a year, it's very chaotic you know it sucks...
it's my crucial year in school and yet things like this happens :(
my grandmother just don't understand how i feel... i'm going to burst...
my grandmother just don't get me. no one does...
i feel like as if i don't have best friends,
today, i badly wanted to tell someone how i felt but everyones just so busy..
everyone is moving on and only me is left in the dark alone,
i feel like i've lost all of my bestfriend and i have no connection of what so ever with anyone. (my family, my friends and even my pet!)

with you with another there's just no space for me to fit in..
i no longer have a space in your life..
you have another person you can rely on you don't need me. you simply just go away. i never ask you to leave, you chose it that way..
if i die now it will be a perfect ending but i can't cause i haven't repay for
my sins...

WAII AND KIM JUNSU!!!!!!!!!!

2009-08-23T08:03:00.000-07:00

THIS NEWS KINDA OLD HAHAHS
i think that they are eligible. sadly they broken up....
i'm in love with kim junsu here...but it seems after the break up he fell sick... they both do look good together... she is kim junsu's ideal type ,cute.
she claims that the public is to blame for their break up but i seriously apologize for the anti fans, fans should be happy that he is dating because you can assure that he's not gay and he look happy with the girl.
if a fan is reasonable and love their idol they should be happy for them and not hate the other party...

i like kim junsu, i'm just a fan and i don't hate this girl... i respect her for capturing his heart...

T.O.P , big bang!

2009-08-23T06:59:00.000-07:00

wonder boys

2009-08-20T05:26:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-I1J7VS9-Qk&feature=related

my loves

2009-08-20T05:18:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekpuqf75lGA&feature=related

dance battle!!!!!!!!!

2009-08-20T04:46:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9djD4E6m7mA&feature=related

saranghae! ft island :)

2009-08-09T19:56:00.000-07:00

watch it

2009-08-09T19:12:00.000-07:00

Damn! this girl(hyeona of 4 minutes) can dance, Mr hot jaebeom is doing his thing'

performances

2009-08-01T23:51:00.000-07:00

2pm - i hate you, aaa & 10 out of 10.

(nickhun is not there though)

breathless

2009-08-01T22:54:00.001-07:00

I am sick I need to quarantine myself in my room can't go near babies and old people such as my granny. I'm feeling like a disgusting germ leaving in the jail. first day of quarantine and i can take it anymore... i feel so restless but with all the messages coming into my phone i ain't that bored anymore. prelims are coming... kill me now, I'm freaking out right now....

thanks for all your concern, i love you guys...

someone i lost recently..

2009-07-28T07:40:00.000-07:00

It's to late to apologize, i realized....
I've done the wrong doings twice not once but twice. i'm sorry!
what else can say. i don't know! my apology seems to mean nothing to
you probably because the sorry i have said was said to many times and can't seem to work now! the power of that word ran out!
you should know that no matter what, you can turn to me, even though i know that both of us can't work out. I'll just lend you a listening ear i will do my best not to turn you off!!!!!! i was super scared to loose you and now that i have lost you i truly regret. i take things for granted just like what my granny said. *sad! :(

To me, bull shitting is not only trash talking but the term bull shitting to me means making the person pissed when they are in the happiest mood...

i'm super happy to know you as a friend or more as my bestfriend.

i just want to say thanks for so many things...

thanks for..

sharing your secrets with me.
trusting and believing in me.
taking good care of me eventhough, i, mysef don't.
dragging me for my check up even when i lied and tried to avoid it.
sharing your wounds and sorrows.
providing a listening ear when necessary.
making me laugh.
standing up for me.
never doubting and looking down on me.

thanks alot... I miss those days where i could smile at you and talk normally, it won't be the same huh...

most of all, thanks for the great memories...
take care of yourself, try not to get hurt or sick kay...
remember take your medicine...

i miss you, buddy

i'm sorry

2009-07-17T10:04:00.000-07:00

Everyone is suffering and all i could do is watch...
i am no help! i'm sorry! i really am...

Jaspreet felt sad upon her problems and i could only see her frown in front of me.
Val is not feeling well and there i go telling her that i'm stress about the littlest things! Carine is filled with problems and i irritate the hell out of her with my sarcasm.. i'm sorry, i'm irritating....
i made letitia freaking pissed with me the other day, she was teasing me and suddenly she dropped her purse with her phone in it and i said sarcastically 'good for you' letitia boiled up and scolded me 'f*ck you'(she apologized a little later on) See where my sarcasm can lead me.... i feel useless and nonsense...

maybe aichin is right i like to jack people but hate to get jacked back up my face... i should stop my rubbish right....
even when it's in a different channel,
i should sit there and listen even when i don't understand at all. it feels like i'm invisible 'sometimes' (most of the time).
Never mind really i'm getting very used to it... i can't say speak English, i might offend ppl...
my previous clique has treated me invisible at least now it feels less invisible..
you can see me but i just don't see myself...

i don't help with your troubles, i simply add on.. i feel so nonsense! just like crap!

-val get well soon:) saranghae!hwaiting..
-jaspreet, i'm sorry that i'm a no help...
-carine, sorry for being irritating...
-letitia, sorry for my nonsense. i'll zip it!
-Aichin, i'll try my best to stop my sarcasm.. i'll stop bullshitting...

~take care everyone:))))))
carine, your english is understandable

watch it, enjoy then tag!

2009-07-12T02:39:00.000-07:00

funny suju! hankyung and shindong

2009-07-11T23:38:00.001-07:00

amazing leeteuk, hot siwon!!!!!!!!!!!!! suju..

2009-07-11T23:11:00.001-07:00

had so much fun.

2009-06-22T07:52:00.000-07:00

i had so much fun thanks to bridget they all and obviously carine.
thanks carine for following me to furama hotel for dinner, saw a hot guy
at dinner. super cute though but never get his number..JOKE!.. hahas...

i loved the movie we watched during bridget's birthday it was 'drag me to hell' the movie scared the hell out of me. i was so paranoid that on that night i couldn't sleep a wink. the old lady must be living a good life now since she most probably scared the crap out of everyone in the theater except the whole row of couple sitting in front of us, annoying. they were so lovey dovey when most of us was probably jumping off our seats.
what i meant was the old should by now be living in a mansion or somehow.
i have no regrets watching this movie.

thanks for the fun days, you guys. hope to have more of it....

having my hopes high.

2009-06-12T06:45:00.000-07:00

MOOD:

am super bored & exhausted.

i went blog browsing just now i reaLISED no one nowadays does a thorough writing of what they

do the whole day anymore. that's why i love Carine's blog will never be a disappointment if you

want a daily checks on a person...

someone like carine is hard to find man. TRUST ME!

in a week i fought with her more than 5 times, had major silent mode moments but we are fine now.... sometimes i wonder if we are a couple! we have frequent fights and quarrel just like couples do.. funny huh?!!! i'm getting used to it anyways.

we fight but we sort things out cause we are just like that hahahs!

she's having too many problems caught up in her head =(

i'm feeling her pain. lols.

yesterday went to macs for our break and ended up taking 2 hours instead of the 1 hour that was given by mr Goh. he was really pissed. he helped me alot. though, i thought he wouldn't help at all but end up i think he helped me more than i ever expected of him.

sometimes teachers are so hard to read they are not as readable as a book nor are they completely unreadable. it's such a relieved that i am finishing my dnt project...

I"M SO GLAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh.......... yesterday saw my bro in macs and also saw samantha wow! she looks hot as per normal!!!!!!

today is a very long day, hahah.. i did manicure for myself! it totally went wrong! hate it!

also today had to go up and down the stairs to print my d&t project it sucks can. i kept on forgetting my thumbdrive and had to go down again to take it. IRRITATING!!!!!!!!

i just think that mr Goh wants all of us to pass in d&t =)))))

i wish i can be of any help!

2009-06-08T07:54:00.000-07:00

this week really is a bore... i mean i appreciate all the company from my friends and all.
somehow i feel a lot useless.
i don't know what i can do or say to make you feel better. i just hope
my presence can make you feel better but it doesn't!
i'm scared for you, i really am. I just try to laugh it off. I may be the most irritating person on earth right now but please bare with it. I really don't know what else can i do for you. i really wish you can smile once again cause i don't see the sunshine when you are frowning...

b-u-d-d-y!!!!!!,
get well soon!

i know chemo is hard but please keep on fighting,
BUDDY! HWAITING!!!!

thanks to.

2009-05-24T07:13:00.000-07:00

my birthday this year is unforgettable thanks to Carine, Jaspreet , Pamela , Letitia & Ai chin.
thanks, this year is super enjoyable and happy for me because of you guys..

thanks to bridget, kasturi, karyun, waiyee, xinying, Priscilla, sophia. for the enjoyable day on saturday at ps with you guys. naomi thank for the thoughts though! waiyee thanks for the present. *nice nice!

thanks to vivien, valerie for the beautiful birthday cards. puvan, brintha & vanessa for greeting me a happy birthday on my birthday.

priscilla (pig salad) thanks for almost making me half deaf and shouting into my freaking ears. ~HAPPY BIRTHDAY~

~i love you guys alot~

sometimes it's not meant to be...

2009-05-24T07:02:00.000-07:00

i love the feeling of being around you and all.
but i also can feel that insecurity with you along,
i love you and all a lot but sometimes it's just not meant to be.
i wish i hadn't done those things to you but what's done is already done.
i wish you all the best i wish the past will come back and i can do it all over but
i know so well it can't. i miss the past but what can i do.
now with you around is just so nerve-wrecking.
i don't want us to end up quarreling once again that's why i have to stay away from you.

you know how much i want the past to come back but it'll never come back but i'll be here dreaming for that day to come, deep within i'm prepared to be rejected by my wish.

i can't afford to be called a hypocrite once again.

my thoughts

2009-05-19T06:09:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow, is my freaking birthday.

i don't want!

I'm aging!!

Oh helps.

16 is old you know!

Who cares right?!

I don't look my age anyways..

Today went out with Bridget, kasturi and karyun for a while..

Karyun sprained her ankle and felt like going home after following Bridget to the bank.

Hope she get well soon!

kas, Bridget and me when to the food junction to talk and have our 'lunch'.

Bridget as per normal made us laugh a lot till we needed to pee.

it was fun,

but if only Naomi was there it would be more fun!

just like old times!!!!

you know.. hahas,

i wish all of you the best!!!!

My Definition of love... it's not hatred.

2009-05-19T05:43:00.001-07:00

Define love to me, cause to me. it's not like those romantic movies you see..
in reality, love don't turn out that way. love is never a happy ending.
it hurts, it burns.
At first you're so touched by love but a few months later, it'll all be gone.
I'm not saying falling in love is a bad thing, it' just a choice or so.
For me, I've chosen to love before. In my experience it truly "sucks" in a way.
Just when you think you're in love.
there's something bound to go against it. it's not a bad thing to love but just bare in mind, the consequences. i still choose love cause my heart tells me to..

There's no remedy for love but to love more...

The disagreement of the heart and mind!

!!ABOUT L.O.V.E!!

2009-05-19T04:35:00.000-07:00

... LOVE...

Are you in love now?
no, no one so far. maybe just a few crushes here and there..

Are you willing to to wait for your love ones?
as long that someone is worth the wait, why not?!

How long will you wait?
It depends how long my heart can wait.

Did you ever love someone before?
yes! who never!?

Ever had a long distance relationship?
yes, but the relationship turned to dust.

Have you ever fall in love with your friend's boy/girlfriend?
no! crazy man. that's just sick!

Do you prefer love, fame or money?
i can live without fame but honestly without love and money. it's just to hard to pick.

Do you trust your friends or love more?
it depends who are my friends and love but for now simple, friends! as I'm not in love yet.

Did you ever love someone but never confess?
umpteen times but to me it's just a crush.

Ever 2 timed before?
NO! never before, never ever. my heart i set only on one person never 2.

When was you major first crush?
in primary 5 probably!

Who was the last person you hugged?
if girls is counted it's Naomi and if it's guy 'P'

Do you believe in love at first sight?
No, that means judging a book by it's cover but crushes do come from first sight.

Ever dated your best friend?
no, ewwwwl. never my best friends are girls.

Did you ever regretted letting go of someone else?
yes. 'P'! but I'm glad you've moved on and I'm glad I've let you go or I'll never see that bright smile of yours again, i wish you the best. i think letting go is the best thing for us right now. I'm very happy you've found someone that can paint the bright smile on your face which I've clearly removed it from you. Our love has finally turned to dust, once and for all!

unforgettable night

2009-05-09T02:04:00.000-07:00

it's been long since i blogged again...
wahahahahha!
i gonna blog about concert day, very nice the concert was great. we had to look up the whole time as we were sitting at the freakin front role at the side, my neck was cracking but it was worth buying the tickets. many many people went: ex-pl lites, pl- lites and peoples....
the whole place was packed. ahahs, rhuenz performed even though she just undergo her surgery, she had a growth in her stomach b the way. doctor said it was since birth, she don't need to do p.e for 6 months so lucky, but her everyday food is steamed fish, no fried food!lols. i don't think she can last hahhas. rhuenz was great, naomi was so great in her dance. cheryl,grace,nicole&joey were great in their chinese drama. jia juan & melanie, no offense i didn't see them but i guess there as great as everyone. hahas, our class prefect was the emcees for the night, she was perfect. that day was a great one. carine took video even after umpteen times the prefect told her not to but still she did.

(C) wore quite nice, she looks like leeteuk from super junior!
she look nice and no offense hot too!!!!!!!!!

you're like a shadow that is untouchable! (married*)

jia yous

2009-04-13T06:46:00.001-07:00

This year is a crucial year for everyone in my class and the sec 4's n 5's.
i wish everyone good luck ~break a leg~
i'm hoping everything will be just fine!!!
i'm still hanging on....

'P' ....please forgive me! forget abt the 10 years.. i'm crazy, you should know...
"miyana, saranghapnida!" i've picked up little from korean dramas.. i'm sorry, i love you...

my dying is for my friends to be happy..
no worries about me!

running out of time!!!!

2009-04-13T06:40:00.001-07:00

i've got no time to think to much these days...
i have a friend that am thankful of... she's my first friend that i talked to in pl.
i realised Since sec 1 i've never really bought her anything for her birthday...
i don't why but i had that sudden urge of just thanking her..
this year would be our last farewell, and i'm hoping you will love the gift....
keep on smiling!

Just read!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-04-10T06:09:00.000-07:00

been feeling sick lately..
medication ain't effective enough in fact it's not helping at all..
i know somethings wrong with my body, but still i'm avoiding my check ups.
To me, everyone has to die someday..it's a matter of time!! and all up to god...

it's obvious how such small matters can become a big matter...

i really just want to get through this year as fast as last year..
my head hurts, and i have problems... i hate going to school with lots of problem in
my head...
i'm really scared what if what brintha say is true...
what if my headache is actually a migraine or worst tumour...
i'm just scared really scared....

i'm sorry if i'm sensitive or get on your last nerve and make you...
i seriously apologize from the bottom of my heart!

the 'advice on dying and living a better life' book, really taught me alot!!!!!

when my late great grandmother pass away in the hospital so many people cried for her
and it made think again... on my death bed or even funeral who will shed tears for me!
it really mad me wonder....

thanks carine for accompanying me to the hospital....

what's there to say!

2009-04-07T06:43:00.000-07:00

Watch it, hopefully you won't get addicted to it like i do!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7QO6SjMsmY8

To be honest i didn't like super junior a lot but after hearing to their songs and watching their live performance my impression of them have changed...
their songs are so addictive and yet i still love it to the max..
Not the kind of music i would normally hear to... but what the heck!

i've been really restless lately,
i have nothing much to do except stressing on my studies, it sucks though but still i'm hanging on.
OMGness!?! i've been a korean freak lately why OH WHY!... soon i'll be flying to korea and i won't even realised. (jokes)
really hope i could concentrate, n'level are coming and i'm getting a major white hair outbreak..

STRESS + MORE STRESS + EVEN MORE STRESS

WHITE HAIR AND BOLD PATCHES!!!

L.O.V.E 2

2009-04-06T06:10:00.000-07:00

Are you a guy who loves, cherishes & cares for me?
Are you a guard in a prison, maximum security?

Do we stay in a corner all the time because you want me to yourself?
or am i locked away, out of fear that I'd find someone else

Well, i don't like living under your spotlight just because you think
i might find somebody worthy
i don't like living under your shadow
Well, if you treat me right you won't have to worry!

Is this a relationship fulfilling your needs as well as mine or is this just my sentence...
am i doing time?
if this is love, real love
then i'm staying no doubt
but if i'm just a prisoner, then i'm breaking out

You ought to be ashamed of yourself
what the hell!!?
what do you think you're doing?
loving me??
oh,so wrong
All i do is try to show you that you're my one and only guy
no matter
who may come along
please open your eyes
because baby, i don't lie! when it comes to my the matters of the heart...

L.O.V.E

2009-04-06T05:58:00.000-07:00

I'm calling his phone up just to tell him how much
I really love him 'cause he's everything I want
He listens to me, cares for me so I truly believe

God sent me an angel from above
That's gonna love me for life
Might as well be perfect only because
It's the only way I can describe, so

If this isn't love, tell me what it is
'Cause I could be dreaming or just plain crazy
If this isn't love, tell me what it is
'Cause I never felt like this baby
If this isn't love

L O V E, what is in me?
L O V E, oh, if this isn't love
L O V E, what is in me?
L O V E, oh, if this isn't love

I'm selfish 'cause I don't wanna share him with nobody
Not even those people that came before me
But see, I never believed

God would send me an angel up from above
That's gonna love me for life
Might as well be perfect only because
It's the only way I can describe, so

L O V E, what is in me?
L O V E, oh, if this isn't love
L O V E, what is in me?
L O V E, oh, if this isn't love

Love, L O V E
Love, L O V E

a memo

2009-03-23T06:51:00.000-07:00

just let me be clear about anything

I'm not taking sides it's just too messy sorry!

can't we just leave in peace and harmony..

trashing everything out!

2009-03-23T06:08:00.000-07:00

it has been a freaking weird day for me..

I'm not the type of person that blogs everyday about my life in this blog..

hey just think it this way if a stalker wants to know your everyday doings he/she can

simply view this freaking blogs.

Because of blogs people can get misunderstandings...

why why why why??????????????????????????????????????????????????

i can't be bothered really i did nothing wrong 'll just keep writing no one will read it anyways..

I gave up on hope, so long time ago....

I'm super happy to be friends with Asyraf..

he is a very super nice guy.. polite, thick skin though still he has a good heart.

there was this guy that i got to know not long ago..

at first i thought he was the stubborn and stuck up type..

he turned out to be a fantastic guy, so sad =( he used to crush my senior. when i used to crush him... heart pain heart felt....

life still have to move on! no point to be emo!

2009-02-06T03:27:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was Joel's birthday (Christine friend)
it was weird cause i know no one there! except the people who came with me!
they went to new york new york in Kovan
it was fun i guess!
they threw cake to each other especially to the birthday boy

it was sick man!
no regrets of going!

most of the time we cam whore!

the staff in new york new york were really nice, we messed up the place with cake
they were understanding but we ended up cleaning the place...
froggy didn't come! awww so sad, somebody lah
brintha should be happy! bute ending was disappointing

i'll elaborate more about the cake 'fight'
we bash the cake on the birthday boy's face and he eventually threw it back to everyone...

i wish... to tell

2009-02-05T22:31:00.000-08:00

is giving up the only thing i can do,
i dont want to see myself in my reflection as a girl who can't make it through hard times
but givin up is the best thing right what i said in my previous post,
i'd just realise everysingle time i do somethogn good and feel happy aboutit why does a bad thing top it hurts so bad.. i really don't feel like hurting myself anymore..

one the flames just scream my name!

writing once again

2009-01-30T05:34:00.000-08:00

it's been long since i wrote...
tell me about it.. my laptop has dust on it..
it's my senior year as a sec 4. i doesn't feel like one!

how could this possibly turn out like this =!
i miss sec 1 days how i wish i could turn back time,

missing those days where i know completely nothing about you,
and next minute we were talking like as if we've known each other for years.

some how i wanna leave school but somehow i don't!
i know i'll miss the
teachers,the friends i've made throughout the years i've been in the school, the
crazy memories only you and i, can always remember, the quarrells we share and
not let it take it too personal. and the environment i've gone through with the support of u

it's so hard to say goodbye!
those words are just ain't right!

before our last farewell, can we hug and be friends once again...

:)

2008-11-16T19:47:00.000-08:00

very long i never blog, damn nothing to write but today feel like it

i'm at carine's place in another words (crib,house)

damn bored nothing to do...

friendster under maintenance haiz...

help me kill boredom by writing lols.

i'm very glad that carine is very happy recently ba,

i damn sad not because she is happy but because i feel that something's missing

i MISS the people who were once around me, i miss them cracking their jokes,

MISS going to school, we act like complete stranger. i feel awkward!

i totally MISS you guys the happiness we created has gone into the bin,

i MISS hearing your laughter, i miss it! LAME STUFF WE DO, I MISS YOU, i really do!

hopefully everything will go back the way it is, with the people around me now and then to

be with me! i miss you guys loads i wish you feel the same way too

2008-08-25T06:53:00.003-07:00

2008-08-25T06:48:00.000-07:00

silent me............

2008-08-07T22:08:00.001-07:00

is it wrong to want something so bad?

can i know what if you like this person alot and you hope that person

notices you, i wish i could turn back time.

i wish i could be the friend that you cry to.

i rather have you as a friend then nothing . is it so wrong to love one sidedly???

i wanted us to be more than friends but i just can't

i love you so much!

but you just left me like that!

zwzwzzwzwzwzwzwzwwwzzwzwzwzwzwzwzwzwzzwzwzwzzwzwzz

i like you alot but i just can't tell you. eventhough i want to!

i don't think you ever think of me! like how i do about you!

2008-07-27T03:07:00.001-07:00

this video is out of the world man

2008-07-27T02:50:00.000-07:00

2008-07-24T08:04:00.000-07:00

i'm the best to cover my feelings nowadays
i don't wanna hurt no one's feeling
i rather get hurt then hurting someone else.

but when it came to you,
i felt like i was too mean. i didn't give you any chance.
i'm sorry
it's too late right now i can't do anything anymore,
i wish i could tell you how much i like you but i have no more chance.
time to time,
you gave me chance but i push it away.
you're the first person i hurt alot. i'm sorry!
you've found someone great for you
i wish you/her won't treat each other like how i treated you
i should have told you earlier.......
how i felt about you

2008-07-24T07:24:00.000-07:00

i feel so,
NO IDEA!
is it sad?! am i suppose to be sad tell me, well i'm not
yesterday had oral with mrs kumar. SCARY!!!!!!!!!!!
good news my ipod can work hahahs.
help me!!
i think i'm sad about kai.
what's worst is that i have no one to complain it to.
you're so far away!
i'm really pissed and i feel like crying but i can't i have to put up a strong front
in front of my friends they all.
it's so embarrassing!
i have no interest and no joy in dancing. he's gone for good
i want to cry. really bad
i know i should be happy but i can't
if i'm sad people will say i'm emo
when i'm happy i feel so fake!
i wish i could be invisible.
but i say i deserve what i got , it treated you like trash. but hell no you didn't
yell nor scream. i'm horrible i'm mean! i'm sorry
i have no guts to face you.

tragic!

2008-07-12T19:41:00.000-07:00

i hate today, really hate it to the end of the core
i realise my ipod my 4gb ipod is spoilt help me!!!!!! i'm bursting out with tears
my whole family chip in for this ipod now it's spoilt!!!!!
$400 gone waste!!!!!
it's not really the ipod is knowing my whole family chipped in for that thing and
i didn't took care of it properly .
on top of it brian is gone,
why can't you tell me you're leaving for good. why lies came out from your mouth.
i'm so lost! i need you to be here!!!
i miss you !

2008-07-11T04:13:00.000-07:00

do you know how it feels like to keep thinking there is something going on when nothing
really does. why can't you just look away i'll forget you after that, stop making me think that it's obvious you have something for me. i'm feeling like a fool. just stop

2008-07-11T04:00:00.000-07:00

Dancing is a hobby and passion for me ,
just let it out yos!
everyone need something to relax themselves
right, my way is D-A-N-C-I-N-G.
why i have the sudden feeling to dance maybe because i miss
brian i guess he left. BYE BYE
1 week without you my buddy (ILY).
how am i suppose to survive tell me....

i know i have kai so what he's useless, joke

help anyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.
i miss you it's not even 24 hours yet.
1 week how am i suppose to survive the boredom.
i wish you all the best in fulfilling your dreams.

2008-07-11T03:37:00.001-07:00

a word or so... from the bottom of my heart...
i'm trying not to be emo!!!!!!!

when you asked for my hand i gave it to you
when you asked for a smiled i grinned for you
when you asked for the steps to groove, i teach you

when you asked for my heart, i'm so sorry i can't give it you

feelings fade if you want them to.
just think of the good stuff, leave sadness behind.
don't bring that frown everywhere where the whole world could see, just bury it
in a box, and place it where no one could ever open it.

feelings come and go, if it hurts deeply then it takes longer to forget. somehow!
it's better to let go and then later.

2008-07-11T03:32:00.001-07:00

this is so coolious......

2008-07-08T08:23:00.000-07:00

2008-07-08T08:01:00.001-07:00

she can dance dudes

2008-07-08T06:43:00.000-07:00

i have more to say hahs
i don't know everything is going upside - down, it's true !

true friends are there forever
they provide unconditional love, they laugh, cry, grow together

now,
friendship state i don't know what is wrong with vane!!!!!!!
i know you want to see him is just that i can't do that for you
it's just wrong.

why are things so complicated when it actually seem so simple to know

2008-07-08T06:24:00.000-07:00

watch this the guys can groove babe!

i have something to say

2008-07-08T05:25:00.000-07:00

TODAY!

i want to write something i know i do, today i'm quite sick la.
but still i feel energetic, today wanted to vomit really bad.
today pophia straighten her hair look like linda isn't that cute. she's still
adorable hahahs, on saturday was kai's birthday i just told myself to forget it
i didn't go, and also i never go to watch the preview with carine, i wasn't allowed i felt sad!
the whole weekend spend it at home, HOME SWEET HOME! lols
do you know how boring was that!?= super to the max man!
class today suck as per normal, maths was half dead maths was like art instead.
drawing here,drawing there!! like english was any better but i learn today
first time first time joking hahahs.. this lately is quite sueh if go out CONFIRM see someone
singapore is so small hahas, it's like a movie or some drama must bang into someone, WHY?!
today did the makan cheer, learned from the camp. (sec 3 camp)
enjoyable like crazy hahas. i kept low profile in camp. tried to keep my mouth shut failed in that!
i'm open to anyone that wants to talk to me serious !
seriously, if you guys know us(my class) better we are not that bad you know we are nice people
=) we are freaking sick talker and lame but it's all a joke..
sorry if we cause any misunderstanding last time, it's not on purpose thing!!!
the camp made us understand the sec3 unity more. we are gonna graduate together.
might as well be friends right!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
don't hold the grudge, we learn to chill. move with the wind babe!

2008-06-25T04:27:00.000-07:00

They come and go but they don't know That you are my beautiful I try to come closer with you But they all say we won't make it through But I'll be there forever You will see that it's better All our hopes and our dreams will come true I will not disappoint you I'll be right there for you 'til the end The end of time Please be mine I'm in and out of love with you Trying to find if it's really true oh no no no no How can I prove my love If they all think I'm not good enough But I'll be there forever You will see that it's better All our hopes and our dreams will come true I will not disappoint you I will be right there for you 'til the end The end of time Please be mine I can't stop the rain from falling Can't stop my heart from calling you It's calling you I can't stop the rain from falling Can't stop my heart from calling you It's calling you I can't stop the rain from falling Can't stop my heart from calling you It's calling you But I'll be there forever You will see that it's better All our hopes and our dreams will come true I will not disappoint you I will be right there for you 'til the end The end of time Please be mine!?

it's been long ya!

2008-06-16T07:31:00.000-07:00

holidays about to end..
i'm sad so so sad...
it's been fun, i found out that love is such a crazy thang!
i made a promise to eye candy till end of sec school, i hope...

my birthday coming.

2008-05-16T07:28:00.000-07:00

yay! its coming
its coming MY BIRTHDAY

happy: to celebrate the date of my birth
sad: i'm aging! have loads of white hair
today is a sad, so was yesterday
jaspreet have misunderstanding with bridget and vivien (clique 10)
i'm in between!!!!!!!
i ain't gonna side lorhx.
i hate it when they "fight"
come on its gonna be my birthday
now i know y i'm having white hair it's because of them

hmmp what should i do
die lah die lah!
riot beware!!!!!!!
stand 100 feet away from them!!!!!!!
BRIDGET,VIVIEN and JASPREET
argh..............

thanks for the letter>>>>>
:D claris

a fresh beginning ...

2008-05-14T07:42:00.000-07:00

MY PREVIOUS BLOG WAS

SO........ HAPPENING!
im not those type of person that want people to think wrongly of me it sucks especially those people who judge people by its cover not listing names.. but they really suck....

! RAWKS

2008-04-06T00:20:00.000-07:00

today
as i am posting gonna change to meet lynn
im quite last minute person hahahs! she'll kill me its be long since i see her
my best friend in primary school i love her to the end of the world
how big is the world haha!
THANK GOD MY DAY NOT GONNA BE SO BORING

today then comes tomorrow

2008-03-04T05:50:00.000-08:00

GOODNESS GRACIOUS
ITS BRIDGET

i love you brid-get!
thanks for everything yohs
i know i know i kinda lame and emo but you tolerate
i love you!
i know i have issues with the whole world.
SORRRRRRRRRRRIEEEEEEEEE
i really can't help hahahs LOLS!

my one and only
NAOMI!

dude!
love ya love ya
loads forever EVEN wen you are in your afternoon
- drank - mood
hahs! thanks for tolerating everything

DJ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
KASTURI
wohooooooo
turn the beat now!

yohs honey !
the sweetest little thing
me have very bad anger so-
sOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRie!
you know you know i'm taurus
temper bad! right but anyways thanks yah

SPREAD THE LOVE <3